Welcome to Awesome Etiquette, where we explore modern etiquette through the lens of consideration, respect and honesty. On today’s show we take your questions on cheese plates and asking for extra crackers, waiting to open Christmas gifts sent through the mail, adding guests without asking the host, and money matters on vacation. For Awesome Etiquette Sustaining members our question is about showing up early. Plus your most excellent feedback, etiquette salute and a postscript on keeping your dinner reservations.
Bonus Question
Your question of the week is about showing up early for the party.
Etiquette Extra - Opera Day, Feb. 8th
Once upon a time, back in 1922, there was a special place in Emily Post’s Etiquette, for manners that were specific to the opera. How to move between boxes, what kinds of gowns were best for openning night, and when not to remove one’s gloves were all topics addressed in some detail. From Chapter VI:
EXCEPTING a religious ceremonial, there is no occasion where greater dignity of manner is required of ladies and gentlemen both, than in occupying a box at the opera. For a gentleman especially no other etiquette is so exacting.
In walking about in the foyer of the opera house, a gentleman leaves his coat in the box—or in his orchestra chair—but he always wears his high hat. The “collapsible” hat is for use in the seats rather than in the boxes, but it can be worn perfectly well by a guest in the latter if he hasn’t a “silk” one. A gentleman must always be in full dress, tail coat, white waistcoat, white tie and white gloves whether he is seated in the orchestra or a box. He wears white gloves nowhere else except at a ball, or when usher at a wedding.
As people usually dine with their hostess before the opera, they arrive together; the gentlemen assist the ladies to lay off their wraps, one of the gentlemen (whichever is nearest) draws back the curtain dividing the ante-room from the box, and the ladies enter, followed by the gentlemen, the last of whom closes the curtain again.
Feb 8th, Opera Day, provides a nice reminder to revisit the incredible art-form that is Opera, and the central role it played in society just a few generations ago. What better time to dust off a favorite CD or record, or even book a ticket and support your nearest theater. And if this has you thinking, “You know, I don’t think I ever actually listened to an opera.” May we humbly recommend Mozart’s Magic Flute as a beautiful and approachable place to start.
Until next time.
We wish you well,
Dan and Lizzie
Episode 439 - Money Matters