Etiquette Today: Formal Wedding Invitations
We take a look at formal wedding invitations to help those planning with their wording.
Formal Wedding Invitations
For many, a formal wedding invitation may be the only formal invitation they ever issue. While many people opt for semi-formal and casual styles for weddings, when it comes to formal invitations, there are some finer points to pay attention to that are the things that help step up this type of invitation from the everyday - or even the “dressy side of everyday.” Here are some tips about formal invitations and samples, along with a link to one of our best wedding invitation resources, Samples of Formal Wedding Invitation Wording.
Formal for Formal
Your formal invitation style should really only be used with a formal event. Sending a formal invitation for a casual event creates awkwardness for your guests who are trying to dress for (and prepare themselves to behave and enjoy) a formal experience. Consistency is very considerate when it comes to communicating with your guests and this includes the formality of the event.
Finer Points of Formal
These are the elements of a formal invitation that elevate it from an informal/semi-formal invitation and the casual invitation.
Use third-person wording.
The wording is centered - except for the RSVP, which is set justified to the left.
Use full names and titles. (Middle names are optional. Initials are not used.)
The hosts of the wedding are listed first. If there are multiple hosts, each person or couple is listed on a separate line. For bride-groom couples, the order of names has been structured like this:
Bride’s mother (and partner if she has one)
Bride’s father (and partner if he has one)
Groom’s mother (and partner if she has one)
Groom’s father (and partner if he has one)
For bride-bride, groom-groom, and fiancé-fiancé couples, you really have free reign to choose the order of names that best suits you and your relationships and the hosting duties of those involved. Some people list folks in order of contribution, others choose alphabetically, and others go with age when it might be a grandparent or great-aunt in the hosting mix. Whichever way you choose, your goal is to honor those who are in the position of host.
Don’t use punctuation except for titles or suffixes and when using a comma in the writing out of the date.
Abbreviations are not used except for social titles (doctor and military titles are professional titles; they get spelled out unless space is a concern). While some might choose also to abbreviate a suffix (John, Jr.) the more formal approach is to write it out (John, junior).
British spellings are often used in formal invitations. “the honour of your presence” and “the favour of your reply” whether you choose the American or British spelling be consistent.
If the ceremony is in a house of worship, use the wording, “request the hono(u)r of your presence…” If otherwise, use “request the pleasure of your company”
The bride is typically listed with her first and middle name, however, some choose to list their last name as well. Using a title is less common, but because it is formal, we can’t find much fault with it if a bride feels confident about using her social or professional title. (Katherine Marie, Katherine Marie Mcallen, or Doctor Katherine Marie McCallen)
The groom is listed with his title and full name. Mr. Alan Bryan Simmons
Numbers and dates are spelled out: “the twentieth of June,” “at half after three o’clock,” the year is optional, “Saturday, the twentieth of June two thousand twenty-four. (Many people put an and in the year two thousand and twenty four, grammarians will balk but most people don’t notice that it’s not traditional.)
Do not include the phrase “in the morning/afternoon/evening” after the time.
One-word numbers are spelled out in addresses: Forty Carpenter Road; otherwise, use numerals 42 Carpenter Road.
You may use any of the following formats for the RSVP: RSVP, R.S.V.P, R.s.v.p., and “The favo(u)r of your reply is requested.”
For examples of formal wedding invitations for all kinds of scenarios, check out our Sample Formal Wedding Invitation Wording article at emilypost.com.
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