Etiquette Throwback: 1922, The Everyday Tea Table
This section of Emily Post Etiquette from the 1922 edition discusses the etiquette of everyday tea.
The Every-day Afternoon Tea Table, Emily Post Etiquette, 1922
EMILY POST ETIQUETTE, 1922, pg 171
THE EVERY-DAY AFTERNOON TEA TABLE
The every-day afternoon tea table is familiar to everyone; there is not the slightest difference in its service whether in the tiny bandbox house of the newest bride, or in the drawing-room of Mrs. Worldly of Great Estates, except that in the little house the tray is brought in by a woman—often a picture in appearance and appointment—instead of a butler with one or two footmen in his wake. In either case a table is placed in front of the hostess. A tea-table is usually of the drop-leaf variety because it is more easily moved than a solid one. There are really no “correct” dimensions; any small table is suitable. It ought not to be so high that the hostess seems submerged behind it, nor so small as to be overhung by the tea tray and easily knocked over. It is usually between 24 and 26 inches wide and from 27 to 36 inches long, or it may be oval or oblong. A double-decked table that has its second deck above the main table is not good because the tea tray perched on the upper deck is neither graceful nor convenient. In proper serving, not only of tea but of cold drinks of all sorts, even where a quantity of bottles, pitchers and glasses need space, everything should be brought on a tray and not trundled in on a tea-wagon!
A cloth must always be first placed on the table, before putting down the tray. The tea cloth may be a yard, a yard and a half, or two yards square. It may barely cover the table, or it may hang half a yard over each edge. A yard and a quarter is the average size. A tea cloth can be colored, but the conventional one is of white linen, with little or much white needlework or lace, or both.
On this is put a tray big enough to hold everything except the plates of food. The tray may be a massive silver one that requires a footman with strong arms to lift it, or it may be of Sheffield or merely of effectively lacquered tin. In any case, on it should be: a kettle which ought to be already boiling, with a spirit lamp under it, an empty teapot, a caddy of tea, a tea strainer and slop bowl, cream pitcher and sugar bowl, and, on a glass dish, lemon in slices. A pile of cups and saucers and a stack of little tea plates, all to match, with a napkin (about 12 inches square, hem-stitched or edged to match the tea cloth) folded on each of the plates, like the filling of a layer cake, complete the paraphernalia. Each plate is lifted off with its own napkin. Then on the tea-table, back of the tray, or on the shelves of a separate “curate,” a stand made of three small shelves, each just big enough for one good-sized plate, are always two, usually three, varieties of cake and hot breads.
Emily’s description, even with its detail down to the size of the fabric placed under the tea tray, always makes us want to serve a proper tea (even just for ourselves) to make for a lovely afternoon. When she was growing up in New York society during the Gilded Age, teas were one of the most common social events Emily would have attended. They are the old-school version of today’s “hangouts” in many ways. Afternoon tea was a socially acceptable way for people (especially women) to spend time together. Teas were often used to welcome newcomers, celebrate visiting guests (and also allow them to meet your social circle), and as a way of making introductions. And of course, sometimes you’d throw a larger tea party simply because parties are fun!
While many of us are prone to pour and enjoy a cup (or mug) of tea either alone or while hanging with friends, a tea tray with options and treats to eat does start to evoke a sense of something special. There’s more effort put into it, and more decadence too. And it’s a chance to break out the “good stuff” from your serving ware and use it!
Whether you choose to serve afternoon tea while hanging out in yoga pants with your bestie on a Sunday afternoon or go full-on tea party with invitations, vast spreads of cakes, treats, and tea sandwiches we hope that Emily’s detailed description and your own entertaining style combine to allow you to enjoy all the delights of an afternoon cup of tea.
If you’re interested in learning more about tea and tea service check out Ellen Easton’s books The Afternoon Tea Guide and Tea Travels. Click here.
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That’s it for today! Thanks for taking a dive back in time with us. We’d love to hear from you about how the tradition of serving tea has manifested (or not) in your life. Do you have aspirations to one day host a formal tea (maybe even a gilded-era-themed tea!) or have you cultivated a tradition of serving tea when your friends come to hang? Tell us about it in the comments, or you can share your thoughts with the Awesome Etiquette Podcast by emailing us at awesomeetiquette@emilypost.com or texting 802-858-5463(KIND).
Next up is the Saturday Sip, until then!
Cheers!
Lizzie and Dan
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My mum often staged afternoon tea parties for us - complete with tiny butter and cucumber sandwiches - and it was during those times that she educated me on manners and deportment. She hosted the parties in our usually off-limits living room, and always had room for a cherished stuffed animal to be the honoured guest. Thank you for bringing this lovely memory to mind.
I just realized reading this that my parents coffee table all growing up was one of these drop leaf tea tables! Imagine carrying all of that heavy stuff just on one tray though 😖 I’d be so fired if that was my job, I’d spill it all!