The Cover Letter

Welcome to the second installment of our series on Getting the Job: the cover letter. Your cover letter is a great way to allow your voice to shine through during the application process. Whether you’re dropping off resumes for companies to keep on file or applying directly to a job listing, the cover letter is a chance to be heard in your own words and highlight your strengths. Let’s look at the details of a cover letter so you can feel confident as you craft your own.

Formatting Your Cover Letter

Your cover letter should be formatted as follows: left-aligned, 1-inch margins, 1 page, single-spaced, 10- to 12-point font, and in a professional font such as Times New Roman or Arial. If you submit the cover letter in physical form, use resume-weight paper, which is 24-32 lb. One-hundred-percent cotton paper will give the document a unique, softer feel; it is another recommended way to up your resume game and distinguish yourself.

The basic body layout is that of a business letter. If you don’t have your own personal stationery, you’ll put your contact information across the top in a stylized format like this: Your name, centered, with some combination of email, phone, and either city and state or full address, centered and in a smaller font size below it, is a clean and modern way to go. Choose a style that feels right to you. If you do have personal stationery, only use simple versions, nothing with illustrations or ornate monograms. Simple and clean is the goal.

For the body, in the top-left corner, include the date. Two lines down, put the recipient’s name. The next line down contains the company address. The next line down contains their phone number, followed one line down by their email address. You then skip two lines and begin your salutation.

The Cover Letter

A cover letter is your opportunity to share some of your personal voice with those making hiring decisions. Rather than a chore, it’s a chance to highlight or address specific details about your qualifications, fit for a position, and even objectives you would accomplish if offered the role. It is a professional opportunity to get a little more personal about why you want a job, what you bring to the work, and what you can offer an employer. It also presents your written voice to whoever reads it.

Spend some time thinking about your qualifications, the person you are writing to, and the organization they represent. A cover letter allows you to show your interest and address specific attributes of the organization that you find admirable, attractive, or a good fit. If you learned of the job through a specific person or channel, you can mention that person here in the cover letter. “After running into Vishal Gupta at the Crypto 2025 conference last month and hearing the goals of NewWay Financial, I knew I wanted to apply for the position of Chief Technical Officer.” Rather than “I’ve known Vishal Gupta since high school, we were close then because his father and my father golfed together. Upon his encouragement and recommendations, I am applying for the position of Chief Technical Officer.”

The body of the letter begins with a salutation on its own line. We are fans of “Dear Ms./Mrs./Mr./Mx. Important Person,” and try to avoid “To Whom It May Concern” unless no other option is available. Even beginning with “Dear Hiring Manager” or another position title can give what follows a more direct feel.

Write clearly and succinctly; the first paragraph is your first impression. Demonstrate your understanding of the position you are applying for, share how you learned about it, and briefly touch on why you and your experience make you a suitable candidate. There is no need to do all your “standing out from the crowd” in your first few sentences; keep it clear, direct, and specific to the job.

The second paragraph is your chance to shine. Expand on your qualities and how you can fulfill the expectations outlined in the job description. Focus on specific experiences or skills and how they show your capacity and fit the employer’s requirements. Now, highlight your key achievements related to what you hope to do at this job. This is not the time for false modesty.

The third paragraph is your closing statement and written sign-off. Now is a good time to share a vision. Without restating your skills and how they could benefit the company, share how you could bring the work you’d be doing forward. What do you envision being able to do with this position and for the company if given the chance? Keep the focus on what you can do together.

Close with a thank-you for the effort, consideration, and time that goes into reviewing applicants, and your enthusiasm for a reply or any next steps. Before you get to your closing, write, “Thank you for taking the time to review my resume.” Keeping this as its own sentence, separate from a closing, is a nice touch.

“Sincerely” should close your cover letter, with a comma after the word. If you are not physically signing, your name goes on the next line, or leave a few lines to make room for your written signature above your printed name.

To give the digital version of your cover letter a more personal touch, get a digital version of your actual signature to use.

Finishing Touches

Here are a few finishing touches to take care of. It’s best to do this a few hours, or even a day or two, after you’ve written your letter. Proofread, proofread, proofread! Review the following to make sure you’ve given your cover letter a good second look.

1. Double-check the content. Is anything missing? Is any of it overkill that you can delete?

2. Assess the tone by reading it out loud.

3. Copyedit for grammar and spelling.

4. Read for accuracy of names, numbers, statistics, and more.

Save It Well

Save your cover letter as a PDF file for online applications so it is unalterable and easily shared. Name the file with your name and “cover letter” (Janet Smith - Cover Letter).

PRO TIP Save a more generic version of a cover letter that you can easily switch out the names of companies, job titles, and goals or visions for the role, so that you can easily update any cover letter you need to write and make it specific to the job to which you are applying.

Sample Cover Letter

Have you read an incredible cover letter from a job applicant before? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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What better way to help someone who wants to improve their life than by giving them the gift of etiquette? SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many great gift options!

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Thank you for spending some time with us today! We hope you enjoyed this installment of Etiquette Today. Next time we’ll take a look at the resume and just what you should and shouldn’t include on it.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

Job Applications

Welcome to our series on Getting the Job. For the next few weeks, our Etiquette Today column will explore different aspects of applying for and interviewing for a new job. Whether it’s your first job out of school, or you’ve been in the game a long time and are looking to switch things up, paying attention to how you present yourself and applying a few classic good manners will go a long way to making a great impression! We’re going to start our series by looking at the application process. Next time, we’ll explore the cover letter. Let’s get started!

Applications

Some jobs will have an application process that might require you to fill out forms, others might ask you to fill out forms and provide a resume, and other jobs you’ll apply to by simply submitting a cover letter and resume.

For those who require application forms, start by double-checking the application deadline and any requirements, such as prior work experience or specific degrees, so you know you’re still in a good position to apply.

As you move on to the application, it’s important that you complete it and provide everything the hiring company is asking for. In many ways, this is your first test: can you follow directions and provide the correct information?

Double and triple-check your spelling, punctuation, and grammar on every form you fill out. If you’re using an AI writing assistant (like Grammarly or something similar), double-check that it’s giving you good advice. All of these systems are capable of errors that would change the meaning of your words. They can also make mistakes when their suggested edits are accepted by you. For example, Grammarly is currently telling us to put a period at the start of this section (before the word “Some”). We know that’s wrong, so we’re ignoring the suggestion. It also suggested deleting a comma, but when we accepted that suggestion, it deleted the letter before the comma rather than the comma itself. Gotta love technology!

Be careful with the tools you use and proofread everything in your application. Read it aloud to help you catch mistakes. Have a friend read it if you want extra assurance.

The vast majority of job applications are filled out online today, but if you find yourself filling out a form by hand, go slowly and do your best to have legible handwriting. By not rushing, you give yourself the time to concentrate on each letter you write, and your handwriting is more likely to be legible.

If your application will be sent as an email attachment without a cover letter and resume, be sure to include a brief, polite, and positive email to accompany it. Thank the person you’re writing to for the opportunity, state briefly why you think you’re a good fit for the position, and then close your email by wishing them well. If you don’t know the person you’re sending the email to, start with “To Whom It May Concern:”

To Whom It May Concern:

Thank you for the opportunity to apply for the ABC Store Day Manager position. I am a recent graduate of XYZ School, holding a degree in KTL, and I think that, with my organizational skills and experience managing a team at my previous job, I would be a great fit for the position and team at ABC Store.

Attached please find my application. I’m happy to provide more information if needed.

Please feel free to contact me via phone at 555-980-9090 or via email at JKSmith@emailaddress.com.

Thank you for taking the time. I look forward to hearing from you regarding the position.

Sincerely,

Jamie K. Smith

555-980-9090

JKSmith@emailaddress.com

And then, of course, remember to attach your application!

What was one of the most interesting jobs you’ve applied for? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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What better way to help someone who wants to improve their life than by giving them the gift of etiquette? SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many great gift options!

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Thank you for spending some time with us today! We hope you enjoyed this installment of Etiquette Today. Next time we’ll take a deep dive into the cover letter and see how you can set yourself up for success when applying via resume and cover letter.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

What’s in A Name?

Today, we take a look at an excerpt from our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, to explore how to handle corrections around identity (names, titles, and pronouns), both when you’re the one who’s been misidentified and when you’re the offender. The following can be found on pages 152 and 153 of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette. (This book makes for an excellent graduation gift, and signed copies can be ordered through our favorite book shop, Bridgeside Books.

WHEN SOMEONE GETS IT WRONG

The choice to make a correction or not is entirely up to the person who was misidentified. The moment and the mishap will determine what you decide to do, but remember that it’s normal to get things wrong from time to time. Knowing how to issue a proper correction, whether you’re the offender or the offended, can help smooth over the awkwardness.

IF YOU MISIDENTIFY SOMEONE ELSE AND THEY SPEAK UP: Keep your response kind and concerned, and keep the fault on you, not the other person. Let’s say you mispronounce a name; upon receiving a correction, say the name correctly and thank the person for the correction. “I’m sorry; thank you for the correction, Deborah [pronounced as the person has pronounced it].”

IF SOMEONE INCORRECTLY IDENTIFIES YOU: You may choose whether to correct them in the moment (“Sorry, it’s Deb-ohr-ah,” or “Pardon me, my name is pronounced Deb-OHR-ah”) or later on (“I didn’t mention it during the introduction, but I should let you know that my name is Deborah, instead of Debra”). “Instead of” is softer language than “not Debra.” Small tweaks can make a big difference in how corrections are received.

DON’T LET IT GO TOO LONG: If you have a colleague or work acquaintance whose name you repeatedly get wrong, it’s time to set aside the excuses and learn how to say it right. Find examples of the correct pronunciation, write the name down phonetically, and/or rhyme it with something to help remind you. Above all, practice until it feels comfortable and sounds right. It is the height of politeness, and it is necessary to respecting this person.

PRO TIP: If your name is difficult for people to hear or pronounce, it’s helpful to have a “sounds like” example to help people you meet.

Do you have an easily misunderstood name? (Lizzie often has people thinking her name is Libby or Lindsay when they first hear it.) How do you handle correcting others? Are there times when you just let it go? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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With your paid Community Membership, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please consider joining today!

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Give the Gift of Etiquette!

What better way to help someone who wants to improve their life than by giving them the gift of etiquette? SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending some time with us today! We really appreciate your interest in etiquette, manners, and civility, and how to cultivate them in today’s world. We hope you enjoyed this installment of Etiquette Today.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

Outdoor Performance Etiquette

In our last Etiquette Today article, we explored theater etiquette; today, we’re going to take a look at outdoor performance etiquette. From plays and children’s programming to concerts and week-long festivals, there are many events where we enjoy performances outdoors. Let’s look at how to best behave in these spaces given the circumstances.

Know the expectations going in

Use the venue’s website to get information about what’s permitted and what isn’t at this particular venue and performance. Some outdoor audiences are encouraged to bring blankets, chairs, and even their own food, while others may be discouraged from doing so and must rely on what the venue offers.

If you are allowed to bring in items like blankets and chairs, be mindful of where you set up. Concerts for adults usually have standing-room-only seating up close to the stage, while a performance for children might encourage all audience members to set up “camp” as close to the stage as possible. Be mindful of the scenario and don’t try to set up in spaces where the audience will clearly be standing in a large group. You also want to be mindful of setting up near walkways, whether they are obvious or the natural ones that form as the crowd gathers. Use your common sense when it comes to what you bring. Seating and accessories that can block others’ view or cause congestion should be placed as far from the center of the crowd as possible.

It’s okay to sing along and dance, but pay attention

Outdoor venues for concerts can more easily accommodate people wanting to sing along, and sometimes the performers even encourage it. But you want to pay attention to the vibe of the event. An opera being performed with open-lawn seating is not the venue for this, whereas a rock, pop, or other modern music concert will likely encourage it. This is true of dancing, too. Your best bet is to take a moment and look around. If the music is getting you to move your body, but no one else is, you might want to step off to the side of the crowd, away from the edges of it, to start movin’ and groovin’.

Keep an eye on children and pets (if pets are allowed).

It’s important to keep an eye on kiddos. Know where they are at all times. Be aware of how their behavior may be impacting others’ ability to enjoy the performance. If your child can’t see and you want to put them on your shoulders, move to the edges of the crowd where you won’t be blocking people’s views. This is also true if your child can’t help but sing, talk, or dance, and the crowd around you isn’t doing the same.

If pets are allowed, they likely have to be kept on a leash, and you’ll need to have baggies at the ready to pick up after anything they leave behind. If your dog starts to bark, it’s best to move away from where you are, and if the dog can’t stop barking, it’s probably time to take them home, if a quick walk doesn’t help alleviate the energy. It’s also important not to allow your dog to explore others’ picnic sites (or baskets!). Remember, you are responsible for your pet at all times when you’re in public.

Be careful with food and drinks

Take care of any spills, and of course, throw away wrappers and finished food in the appropriate bins. Good etiquette does allow for litter bugs! It’s okay to offer what you’ve brought or purchased to nearby attendees (even though you don’t have to), but never assume the picnic next to yours will share.

Smoke and vape away from the crowd

If smoking is allowed on the premises move away from the crowd and find a place where you’re downwind from the group to smoke or vape. You want to make sure that your plumes won’t be bothersome to others, and that a lit cigarette, cigar (or joint if they are permitted) won’t catch someone’s body or clothing. Those who vape might think their vapor isn’t an issue, but many who don’t vape notice the aroma and plume. It’s best to follow the same advice as smokers.

Clean up after yourself

While we’ve already said that you should clean up your food and leftover wrappers, either taking them with you or disposing of them in the appropriate bin, it’s equally important not to leave anything else behind, whether that’s pamphlets or programs, wrist bands, or any of your belongings. Be sure your area is clear before you head out.

We’re big fans of the Vermont Symphony Orchestra’s outdoor concerts during the summertime here in Vermont. What are some of your favorite outdoor performances to attend? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

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Can you tell we’re excited for Vermont's weather to warm up? We hope, wherever you are, that you’ve got some plans to catch some outdoor performances sometime soon! Let us know what you plan to see this year in the comments below.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

Theater Audience Etiquette

We are big fans of theater performances, with one of our own, Daniel Post Senning, having worked in the performing arts for years. This is a space where we want to be at our best so that performers can remain focused on their craft and audience members can enjoy the performance without distraction. Let’s look at some of the best tips for good theater etiquette.

Avoid talking

If the performers request audience participation, that’s one thing; otherwise, avoid speaking during the performance. If something must be said, whisper it as quietly as you can, and do so quickly.

Avoid shushing

Excessively shushing a talkative neighbor can be just as disturbing as the talking you’re trying to quiet. Instead, if you want someone to quiet down, either seek out an usher, or raise your finger to your lips and make this quiet please gesture, rather than any actual noise.

Noises off

Turn off cell phones, audible watches, and any other sound-making gadgets before any performance. There are no exceptions.

Lights out

Don’t forget that the screen on your mobile device can be a distraction, so avoid looking at it during the performance. Some theaters place QR codes on seatbacks for more information; they should be accessed only when the house lights are on, not during the performance when it’s dark. You should also avoid using your phone’s flashlight to look for dropped items or navigate to your seat when the house lights are off. An usher can assist you to your seat with their flashlight; they are more likely to use it effectively and not disturb others.

Snap, crackle, pop

Avoid rattling of candy boxes or ice in cups, shaking popcorn containers, munching noisily, smacking or cracking gum, and slurping drinks. All of these noises are highly distracting to those around you, and might even be heard by performers if you’re seated close to the stage.

Control coughing

Muffle coughs and sneezes with a handkerchief or tissue, or use your elbow. Cough drops and mints may be helpful, but head to the lobby or restroom if you can’t stop the attack.

Avoid other sounds

Rattling the pages of programs, tapping feet or drumming fingers, humming or singing along, rummaging in purses—these are just a few of the things that can annoy those around you.

Don’t block others’ view

Auditorium seating is often arranged so that the person in the seat behind can see between the two seats in front of them, so slumping sideways or lounging on a partner’s shoulder blocks the view. Hats are another potential view-blocker. If your hat is part of your outfit, you can keep it on as long as it doesn’t block anyone’s view.

Smoke only in designated areas.

Not as common an issue today, but it’s worth noting that you should leave and find a place outside and away from the doorway if you must smoke.

No photos, videos, or use of flash

All of these can distract performers or make other audience members uncomfortable or inconvenienced.

Dispose of trash, including chewed gum, in waste containers.

Never leave trash at your seat; always take it to a receptacle for disposal. Tell an attendant if anything was spilled as a courtesy to the next person who will have your seat. Gum should always be wrapped up and disposed of properly; it is never okay to stick it to the bottom of the seat or armrest.

Coming and Going

When you have to access a seat in the center of a row, face toward the performers, the stage, or the front of the theater. If you need to hold or place your hand on something for balance, you have the seat in front of you.

Is there theater etiquette you are particularly fond of or appreciate? Let us know your best practices in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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With your paid Community Membership, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please consider joining today!

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Have you been to any great live performances lately? Lizzie went to see Fortune Feimster at the Flynn in Burlington, Vermont, this past weekend and had a wonderful time! The audience participation was excellent! Please share your recent theater experiences in the comments below.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

Top Table Manners Tips

Table manners have evolved over centuries to make eating with others more pleasant and sociable. The more we use good table manners when we dine with others, the more we, and our dining partners, can focus on the conversation and enjoy our time together at the meal. Here are some of the most basic, but oh-so-important, table manners to keep in mind as you eat.

Keep your phone out of the meal

Your phone should be silenced and put away during the meal. It’s okay if your host invites you to take a picture of the table or your plate to do so before you begin dining. Absent that, your phone should not be at the table. You want to keep your focus on the people you are with, and a phone will only be a distraction. If you are in a situation like having a loved one in the hospital or a child at home with a fever, it’s okay to keep your phone on vibrate and let the group you’re dining with know you may need to take a call because of this. But step away from the table if that emergency call comes in.

Put your napkin in your lap and then use it

Place your napkin in your lap as soon as you sit down for the meal. Remember to use it throughout the meal. Your napkin is there to help you clean up little messes and to keep you and your appearance tidy while dining with others. It’s a great tool, don’t overlook it!

Maintain your posture

Avoid slouching at the table; you don’t want it to look like you’re too tired to participate. Instead, sit up straight and keep your head level when talking with others. Obviously, you’ll have to look down at your plate, and that’s okay. Avoid placing your elbows on the table while eating. It is okay to prop your elbows on the table while conversing between courses or once the meal is finished, and always has been, even in Emily’s day.

Hold utensils correctly

Holding your utensils correctly is not only elegant but also helps you maintain the best control over them, so accidents don’t happen. Don’t use your fork or spoon like a shovel. And don’t grip your fork full-fisted and stab your food. Instead, when cutting, hold your fork and knife with the handle in your palm, and use your thumb, index, and middle fingers to grip just at the neck where the handle joins the head of the utensil. This will give you the most control and dexterity with your utensils. When using your fork or spoon alone, the handle rests in the web (perlicue) of your thumb and index finger with your middle finger underneath the neck of the implement, and the thumb and index fingers holding the same spot from either side.

Chew with your mouth closed

It’s incredibly important not to gross out others while we dine with them. And chewed-up food being seen, or worse, escaping your mouth, is definitely gross to most people. Keep your mouth closed while there is food or drink in it. This also means no talking with your mouth full. If you have a condition that prevents you from closing your mouth while you chew, do your best to cover your mouth with your hand or a napkin. If someone asks you a question when you’ve just taken a bite, you can gesture with your hand (usually index finger up) to convey you will answer in “just a moment” while you finish chewing and then swallow before you speak.

Don’t groom or attend to hygiene at the table

Brushing your hair, applying makeup, and doing things like picking at your teeth should all be done in the restroom, not at the table.

Do not pass gas at the table

While a small burp, kept silent, can sometimes be done at the table by covering your mouth with your napkin and not taking a gasp of air before or after it, any other passing of gas should be done away from the table. Excuse yourself to the nearest restroom.

Pace yourself with fellow diners

Avoid rushing through your meal. Take bites while others are talking to you, and then pause while you respond. If you eat quickly, try to slow down so that you don’t finish long before everyone else. While a slow diner shouldn’t be rushed, they can do things like eat while others are talking to help move their meal along. Pay attention to your pacing.

Cut only one piece of food at a time

It’s best to cut only a piece or two of your food at a time, rather than cutting an entire item up at once and then eating it.

Do not slurp your soup or beverages

If your soup is too hot, let it cool for a moment before eating it. Otherwise, remember not to slurp it off your spoon. Slurping is an unpleasant noise at the table, whether it’s coming from eating soup or drinking a beverage.

Ask for items to be passed to you

Do not reach for or grab items on the table; instead, ask that they be passed to you if you need them.

Participate well

Bring your best self to the table. This is a time to enjoy others’ company, to both listen and share, and to enjoy food together. Be sure to take part in all of that as you dine with others.

What are some of the table manners you find the most useful when dining with others? Let us know your favorites in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

How have your table manners been lately? Anything you can improve on? Let us know in the comments below!

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

Your Personal Cellphone at Work

Our cellphones are such integral parts of our everyday lives, yet when it comes to work, their use requires slightly different considerations. Here is a modified excerpt from our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, to help you use your cellphone appropriately at work.

“How you use your personal cellphone at work depends on your company's rules, your work environment, and your personal phone use policies. Some companies have strict no-personal-phone-use policies, and good etiquette suggests compliance. When personal phone use is allowed, or at least not banned, you have to be responsible for yourself and hold yourself accountable for keeping your use to an appropriate level.

• Prioritize the people you are present with. Don’t let your phone control you; don’t respond to it automatically. Keep your focus on the people you are with, and excuse yourself when you take your attention away from those around you and give it to your device.

• Limit the use of cellphones in meetings. Meetings can sometimes be completely phone-free zones, though this is less common today than it was 20 years ago. Monitor your use carefully and try to minimize any distractions you might cause. Using your speakerphone is only okay if you’re conducting a meeting with others in the room who should be on the call, or if you have your own phone booth or private office and can shut the door.

• Most people keep their phones on silent or vibrate while at work, even if their personal phone doubles as their work line. No one wants to hear a ringing phone (let alone twenty different ringtones) throughout the day. On the plus side, this reduces the overall office noise; on the downside, it’s easier to miss calls.

• Use designated cellphone areas. Some companies have rules such as taking your phone outside the office for personal calls, or to a designated phone-use area, like a lobby, specific floor, or part of a building.

How do you manage your personal cellphone while at work? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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We hope wherever you are, you’ll be safe and warm from the winter storm that’s crossing the U.S. this week! If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Paid subscribers can check out our Substack LIVES! where we answer one question from the podcast live on Substack. Recordings are available on our YouTube channel as well.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post Cookbook recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

As a Wedding Guest

As a wedding guest, it’s important to dot your i’s and cross your t’s. Usually, the host and others are managing the largest, most complex party they will ever throw (and if not, it’s often the most meaningful event they’ll ever host), and making it easy for your hosts is kind, and having the confidence to participate well is great for you too!

RSVP

It’s very important to RSVP properly as a directly invited wedding guest. Use the RSVP link or reply card provided, or for a more casual wedding, you may be asked to RSVP via email, an RSVP link, or by phone. It is especially important to RSVP to a wedding by, if not before, the RSVP date. If there is no date, be sure to respond ASAP, and never later than 2 weeks before the wedding.

If you have been given the option of a plus-one, it’s polite to let your host know the name of the person you are bringing. Under no circumstances should you bring anyone who was not included in the invitation. Leave the kids at home if they weren’t explicitly invited, or fly solo if you haven’t been extended a plus-one.

Use The Wedding Website

Wedding websites are intended to give you all the information you could possibly need about the wedding. Explore each page so you can see what your host (or hosts) is trying to communicate about the formality, style, colors, their personal story, their registry, accommodations, directions, venue policies, and travel info. It will all be there ready for you. Going to the website first is more considerate than directly asking the host or the couple, even if it’s a good friend, as they will often be inundated with other questions while planning the event.

Get a Gift

Currently, wedding invitations still require a gift for the couple, regardless of whether or not you attend. The wedding registry offers gift options to choose from. You don’t have to purchase a gift from the registry; however, it can be useful even just to look at to get a sense of the couple’s style and needs. You should always stick to your budget when buying a wedding gift. Quality handmade or sentimental items and gifts not purchased from the registry can also be options. Remember that even if you’ve already given a shower or engagement gift, a wedding gift is still expected. Many people budget accordingly, even planning for a smaller shower gift and a bigger gift for the wedding itself.

Participate Well

A great wedding guest participates well both at the ceremony and the reception. And any other wedding weekend parties they may have been invited to, such as a welcome reception, after party, or farewell brunch. This means showing up on time and in the proper attire.

At the ceremony, remember to be respectful, no shouting anything out at the couple until the end, when you can cheer or whistle once the officiant has declared the couple married. You also want to be mindful of how you take pictures and video (if allowed) during the ceremony. Having your phone up the whole time isn’t polite, and you should turn your “flash” off.

At the reception, make sure to seek out and say the couple and the hosts, and say hello and thank them if there wasn’t a receiving line. Enjoy the refreshments offered, and participate in any activities like dancing, lawn games, and entertainment the couple has provided (yes, talk to the Elvis impersonator, take a dance lesson from the hired instructors, and by all means help yourself to one of those hand-rolled cigars - all surprises and delights we’ve heard of being popular at weddings in recent years)! And while we do enjoy a good bouquet toss, try not to shove anyone out of the way or fight for the bouquet; it’s not polite.

A wedding is truly about the two people getting married, and the focus should remain there. You might want to “get this party started!” but unless your host is looking to you to get people on the dance floor, you want to rein in your inner party animal and take your cues from the couple and other guests. Participate, but don’t steal the show.

Say Thank You Before You Leave

Even if there was a receiving line and you got a chance to speak with the couple during the reception, it’s thoughtful to say goodbye to the couple and the hosts and thank them again for a wonderful time. It also gives you another chance to wish the couple your best as they embark on married life.

What was one of the best weddings you ever went to? What made it so memorable? Let us know in the comments below! Can’t post here? Sign up for our paid subscription and join the conversation.

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

FREE GIFTS: Right now, when you buy a copy of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, you’ll receive a free Emily Post sticky tab notebook and pen, and copies of Emily Post’s Etiquette - The Centennial Edition receive an Emily Post thank-you note ledger. (Copies must be purchased through Bridgeside Books. Offer valid while supplies last.)

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🎶 Outside the snow is falling and friends are calling yooou whooo! 🎶 The holidays may be over, but we’re still quite jolly as we dig our way out from a few days of snow in Vermont. We hope wherever you are, you’re settling back into the swing of post-holiday life and are enjoying a wonderful start to 2026!

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

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With the holidays in full swing and New Year’s Eve right around the corner, now’s a great time to brush up on your holiday party etiquette! We have tips for hosts and guests so that everyone can be on their best, festive behavior when out celebrating.

Hosts

INVITE CLEARLY. Inviting clearly includes making sure it’s easy for guests to know who is invited. Is it the whole family, just parents, or what about plus ones for single guests? As well as whether there are any special themes for the party. You’ll also want to be clear if guests need to bring anything, whether that’s for a potluck-style meal, or a gift swap, or if any cold-weather outdoor activities will be taking place - ice skates, sled, snow gear for a big snowball fight?

USE THE RSVP FOR MORE THAN A YES OR NO. The moment your guests RSVP is a great time to ask whether they have any necessary accommodations, such as mobility needs, food allergies, or religious dietary restrictions.

BE PREPARED. As a host, you want to provide refreshments for your guests, whether that’s a full meal or heavy hors d’oeuvres, depending on your party. And you want to ensure your space not only accommodates your entire guest list comfortably, but is also clean and tidy. Freshen up your restroom, clear away clutter, and, if you need to, shut doors to rooms you’d rather guests not go into.

WELCOME YOUR GUESTS. Greet your guests at the door, welcome them in, and tell them how nice it is to see them or how glad you are they could come. Either take coats or direct guests to where to put them. Always invite your guests to help themselves to a drink or some appetizers as you welcome them into the party.

TAKE PART IN YOUR PARTY. While it can be tempting to busy yourself with catering work, you really want to take part in your party. You can mingle with guests, engaging in conversation and making introductions if necessary, while also refreshing food platters and punch bowls (or bars).

THANK GUESTS FOR COMING. As your party winds down, it’s important to connect with guests as they depart. Helping them with their coats, and thanking them for coming will always be the mark of a polite and proper host.

Guests

RSVP!!!! It’s really important to let hosts who invited you to a party know whether you can make it. Respond to invitations in the manner requested on the invitation. If there is none, your safest bets are to call, text, or sometimes email your reply.

INFORM YOUR HOST. Use the RSVP moment to let your host know of any mobility or dietary accommodations you may require. For food restrictions or allergies, it’s polite to offer to bring something to meet your needs and let your host accept or decline your offer. This is also a great time to ask any questions you might have about the party. Just remember, it’s not polite to ask who the other guests will be. We attend parties for what the host has put together, not for who else will be there.

BE PUNCTUAL. Arrive at the party on time (never early!) Arriving early can throw a host off their game, as they may be putting the finishing touches on the party or finishing up their own preparations. By arriving early, you put the host in the position of having to start hosting sooner than they were prepared to be. Most guests arrive within the first twenty minutes of a dinner party and the first thirty minutes of a cocktail party. If the party is an open house (meaning there are start and end times on the invitation), you may arrive anytime within that time frame. Remember to arrive with anything you’ve been asked to bring or in the attire you’ve been asked to wear.

GREET YOUR HOST & PARTY ON! Be sure to greet your host, especially if another household member (such as a child) answered the door and helped you with your coat. And then jump right into the party! It’s really important to participate in the offerings your host has provided for the party. Games, gift swaps, dancing, and conversation are all things to join in with gusto. Not a games or dancing person? Watch with enthusiasm as the others participate. You also want to be sure to mingle with the other guests and introduce yourself to anyone you haven’t met before. Remember, small talk topics are great for casual party talk.

SAY THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT. When you’re ready, or it’s time to depart, find your host to say thank you and goodbye. You don’t want to Houdini your way out and just disappear into the night. It’s okay to politely interrupt a host who is engaged with others to issue your thanks and goodbye. A text the next day, thanking them for a wonderful time, is a great touch!

‘Tis The Season of Giving!

With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please consider a paid Community Member subscription today!

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

FREE GIFTS: Right now, when you buy a copy of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, you’ll receive a free Emily Post sticky tab notebook and pen, and copies of Emily Post’s Etiquette - The Centennial Edition receive an Emily Post thank-you note ledger. (Copies must be purchased through Bridgeside Books. Offer valid while supplies last.)

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SHARE IT FAR AND WIDE! Please share this article or any of our Substack posts. It’s a great way to support our work at Emily Post.

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We hope you’re enjoying a lovely holiday week with friends and family and are looking forward to some fun New Year’s Eve plans next week! If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

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Receiving Gifts Well

With the gifting holidays in full swing, we thought it prudent to bring a reminder of how to receive gifts well. Gifts are often given with the hope that they will surprise and delight us, and usually they do. However, if a gift misses the mark, it’s still polite to receive it graciously. Here are some tips from our book Emily Post’s Etiquette - The Centennial Edition for receiving gifts well.

There is something so magical about a gift, whether it’s wrapped in shiny paper with lots of bows, or with newspaper and kitchen twine, or even just wrapped in good intentions. The moment we are presented with a gift, the exchange comes alive with excitement and expectations, and you have a role to play. Good etiquette guides us to play this role well and be considerate of the situation we’re in and the others involved. More often than not, we like the item we’ve received, and it’s easy to say “Thank you!” with true enthusiasm. There are, however, many reasons why you might be disappointed or confused by a gift. Finding gifts that people will go wild for is a combination of thoughtfulness and luck. This means there will likely be moments in our lives when we give gifts that receive a welcoming thanks but not an over-the-top reaction and times when we will be given something that slightly misses the mark or that we don’t want or understand.

As long as the gift is not offensive or hurtful, there are plenty of ways to comment on other aspects of an off-the-mark gift while expressing your gratitude, whether it’s for the thought and effort that went into it, or the gift’s color, shape, size, or intended usage. Complimenting and commenting on a gift when you receive it is a great way to connect with the giver. But sometimes you don’t have the words, and rather than forcing a lie that you might get caught in later, you can simply say, “Oh, thank you so much.” You don’t have to fawn over the gift and say how much you love it if you don’t. You don’t even have to come up with one polite thing to say about it. You can simply say, “Thank you.” There are also times when a gift that flops can be appreciated when received with good humor—sometimes the flop can make the gift a memorable moment. “Trey once filled my room with Stargazer lilies, only to learn I was quite allergic! I was an itchy mess but love that it’s one of our early dating memories.”

Sometimes we are receiving gifts as a guest of honor. When we are, it doesn’t hurt to have a practiced “excited-gift-opening-face” that is easily accessible. It’s an “ooh, thank you!” expression. You don’t want to fake it, and you don’t need to be overly excited, especially if it’s not “you” to be so. But throwing in a sincere “wow” doesn’t hurt, either. And when all this is done well, it can make the giver and anyone watching feel good.

Many people feel guilty if they receive a gift and don’t have one to offer in return. But a polite gift exchange isn’t “Here’s a gift for you” and “Here’s a gift for you right back!” There are many occasions when we don’t expect a gift in return when we give one—for example, at a birthday party or wedding, or when accepting a hosting gift. The polite exchange is a gift and a thank-you: “Here’s a gift for you!” “Oh, thank you so much, Philip!” That is where you want to keep the focus as a recipient. We shouldn’t let a feeling of awkwardness about not having a gift to offer in return interrupt our expression of gratitude.

There are times—like certain holidays—when gift exchanges are common. These scenarios can tend to make us focus on the reciprocity aspect of the exchange rather than the gift we’ve been given. If you find yourself being given a gift, and you don’t have one in return, keep your focus on the gift you’ve been given instead of on your lack of a gift to give. Saying, “Oh, I’ll have to get you something, too!” or “Your gift is still on its way,” to buy yourself time is completely unnecessary. It removes the focus from the gift you’ve just been given and the generosity of the other person and places it on your lack of a gift in return. Focus on the gift and the spirit of generosity in which it was given—it really is the polite thing to do. You can always get someone a gift for the occasion and give it to them later on—no excuses needed.

‘Tis The Season of Giving!

With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please consider a paid Community Member subscription today!

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

FREE GIFTS: Right now, when you buy a copy of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, you’ll receive a free Emily Post sticky tab notebook and pen, and copies of Emily Post’s Etiquette - The Centennial Edition receive an Emily Post thank-you note ledger. (Copies must be purchased through Bridgeside Books. Offer valid while supplies last.)

Order Signed Copies

SHARE IT FAR AND WIDE! Please share this article or any of our Substack posts. It’s a great way to support our work at Emily Post.

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A very Happy Hanukkah to those celebrating this week! We hope you’re enjoying a lovely holiday with friends and family. We’d love to see your celebration, if you post pics, tag us so we can share in the fun! If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here.

Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

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Thanksgiving Table Setting

Happy Thanksgiving Eve!! We’re issuing our Etiquette Today article on Wednesday this week, in hopes of catching you in time to make setting your Thanksgiving Day table settings easy as pie.

Here, we’ll cover the essential elements, and you can customize the setting to your own meal and style. Thanksgiving is a holiday that can run the gamut from festive, formal celebrations to super casual, relaxing ones. While some Thanksgiving tables may be set with linens, silver, china, and crystal - oh my! - others can be more relaxed affairs, paper napkins and plates, while enjoying the big game from the couch. It’s not uncommon for formal Thanksgiving table settings to have just one set of utensils (a fork and knife) if only one course - the main course - is served. What matters is that you set yourself and your guests up for success and that you match your setting to the style of your gathering and the elements of your meal.

Below, we’ll explore all the elements of the table setting, and in between, we’ve provided visual aids of different table settings based on the number of courses you’re serving. You can choose what works best for you! The last image is one of the most common settings used on Thanksgiving Day.

Linens

If you’ll be using table linens, this can be an easy step in the table-setting process to do the day before Thanksgiving.

SILENCER - A silencer is a cloth is placed directly on the table and under the tablecloth to help protect the table and reduce the noise of items being picked up and put down. If you don’t have one, a clean, ironed fleece blanket is a great substitute. This is typically used for formal occasions.

TABLECLOTH - Whether you choose something decorative or plain, your tablecloth should be ironed and fit your table. If it’s too small, it’s best to run with a different style of setting. If it’s too big, you can do some creative folding in the center to help shorten the ends. Just make sure the fold doesn’t end up under someone’s plate. Some tablecloths are cherished items. If so, it’s best to keep them pristine by selecting something else. Accidents can happen, and it’s too much to ask your guests not to spill on a tablecloth. Tablecloths are typically used for semi-formal/informal and formal table settings.

RUNNER - A runner is a narrow piece of cloth placed in the middle and running lengthwise down the table. It’s a decorative element that you can use if you wish. People typically use a runner or a tablecloth, but you could layer them if you want. The runner should be ironed. Runners are typically used for semi-formal/informal and formal table settings.

NAPKINS - Cloth napkins are always ironed and either folded into a rectangle or a triangle. For formal table settings, place the napkin to the left of the forks, not under them. You might choose to use napkin rings, in which case many people choose to place the napkin in its ring in the center of the setting. This is more typical when using a charger or placing plates. Cloth napkins can be used in any table setting, regardless of formality.

Utensils

All utensils are set in the order of the courses to be served. It’s not uncommon at Thanksgiving to have a very formal table set with only one course’s worth of utensils or two if you choose to set out your dessert utensils. If dessert utensils are set, you may use both or only the utensil needed. The fork handle points to the left, and the spoon handle points to the right. Allowing for the dessert utensils to easily be brought down on the correct side of the dessert plate once served. If using both, they are traditionally and most formally stacked with the spoon on top; however, though some may gasp to hear us say it, we occasionally see the dessert fork in the top position nowadays, too, and as long as the handles are pointing in the right direction, it makes little difference.

FORKS - Set to the left of the plate (except the oyster fork, which is set to the right of the spoons if used). If salad is served after the entree, you’ll have your salad fork closest to the plate.

KNIVES - Set to the right of the plate, with the blades facing in toward the plate. If salad is served after the entree, you’ll have your salad knife closest to the plate.

SPOONS - The large soup spoon is set to the right of the knives. (See intro for dessert spoon setting options.) If teaspoons are brought out with cups and saucers when tea or coffee is served after the meal or with dessert.

SPECIAL UTENSIL - Special utensils are rarely seen at the Thanksgiving Day meal; however, if you are using something that requires a cracker or pick, you may choose where they best fit in your setting. Typically, special utensils are placed to the right of the spoons, but use your best judgment to balance your setting and make it easy for guests.

Plates

Here, we’ll cover three dishes typical for the Thanksgiving Day meal.

ENTREE PLATE - If you’re not using a charger, you might choose to set your entree plate. This can be done whether you’re having a family-style or buffet service. If plated service is used, the plates are in the kitchen until the course is ready to be served. Or they are collected by the host just before plating and serving begins (extra work!)

BREAD PLATE (W/BUTTER KNIFE) - The small bread plate is placed above the forks and the napkin on the left side of the setting. It should be roughly even in line with the glasses. But it’s okay to adjust a bit to fit your table.

CHARGER - The charger is an option, not a must. It holds the center of the place setting until the main course is served, acting like a tray for salad plates, first course plates, and soup bowls. It is removed before the main course is served.

Glasses

Glasses are placed on the upper right of the setting at about a 45-degree angle off the tip of the knives. The water glass is set first and serves as an anchor, remaining throughout the meal. If you’re serving wine with the meal, the wine glass is placed slightly to the right of and often a little lower than the water glass. If you have multiple glasses, they can be grouped around or cascade down and to the right from the water glass, with the first-course glass closest in reach and the final-course glass nearest the water glass.

Other Elements

Here are some other elements you’ll likely want to place on your table.

CENTERPIECE - There are endless centerpiece options, and whether yours is turkey-themed, full of flowers, or an arrangement of items, it’s a fun way to express your style and set the mood for the table. Pinterest has endless ideas for your holiday-season centerpiece!

CANDLES - Whether tall tapers or short votives, lighting candles for the meal, even if it’s midday, is a great way to elevate the experience and set the ambiance for a fabulous meal.

SALT & PEPPER - It’s good to have salt and pepper for every two or three guests seated at the table. This way, no one has to wait long for these commonly added seasonings.

BUTTER DISH & KNIFE - Two for every four guests is a good ratio. The butter knife should be small enough to be easily passed with the butter plate or dish.

How is your Thanksgiving day table shaping up this year? We’d love to hear about it! Post your thoughts in the comments below; they are open to everyone this week!

‘Tis The Season of Giving!

With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please consider a paid Community Member subscription today!

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Signed Copies Make for Great Gifts!

SIGNED COPIES OF OUR LATEST BOOKS AND TRIVIA GAME are available from our local partner, Bridgeside Books, who can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

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SHARE IT FAR AND WIDE! Please share this article or any of our Substack posts. It’s a great way to support our work at Emily Post.

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We are very grateful that you take the time in your week to turn to Emily Post for a bit of etiquette inspiration. We hope you’re looking forward to a lovely Thanksgiving holiday tomorrow. We’d love to see your celebration, if you post pics, tag us so we can share in the fun! If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip with its Emily Post recipe!

Until then,
Lizzie and Dan

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Active Listening in Business

Today, we have an excerpt from our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, on Active Listening. One of the most valuable skills you can develop for your professional growth (and it will also benefit your personal life) is that of being an active listener. Instead of just waiting to share your thoughts, you can participate more fully and demonstrate respect and consideration to your co-workers and clients by actively listening. Let’s take a look at what that means in practice. This excerpt can be found on pages 128 and 129 of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette.

Active Listening

Good listening skills are paramount to good manners. Sure, you can talk, but can you listen? Can people tell you’re listening? When you listen, do you hear? Listening (and/or paying close attention to nonverbal communication) allows us to participate well in conversations or meetings. How you behave while you listen and how you respond to the speaker will greatly impact the quality of the experience. If we are simply planning out exactly what brilliant, cutting, or hilarious thing we will say next, we aren’t part of a conversation; we are just thinking about speaking. Getting comfortable with the idea that your brilliant remark or amazing idea could go unsaid is a wonderful skill to develop. The humbleness alone is impressive, but learning to have patience and recognize how much of the conversational pie you are entitled to when it comes to speaking versus how much of the pie is you listening will make you a great asset at work and a great conversationalist in life. Here are some traits of a good listener that can keep you actively listening:

• Keep your attention directed at the person speaking. Make eye contact when possible. Focusing on someone’s mouth or the bridge of their nose is an alternative for those who cannot easily sustain or make eye contact.

• Nod and/or say “mmhmm,” “yes,” “uh-huh,” “aha,” “okay,” and other short phrases and expressions that honestly fit the conversation to show that you are following along.

• Do not be distracted by looking at a phone, checking email, glancing at your smartwatch, or scanning the room.

• Respond with questions or comments: “You know, that reminds me of the Helping Hands farm project . . .” “Wait, had he already closed out the meeting when you did that?” or, “Wow, how did that make you feel?” Note that you don’t want to always respond with stories or thoughts about your own life. A good listener and conversationalist will balance this, keeping most of the conversation focused on or relevant to the person speaking.

• Weigh what is important to respond to and what can be left unsaid, rather than responding with every thought you might have. In business especially, there are lots of times when patience and waiting for the right time to talk about something is key to moving things forward well.

It can be challenging to hold back when our minds are filled with ideas or responses to what is being said. But it’s good to remember that the more people involved in a conversation, the more likely we are to spend time playing the role of listener. After taking a closer look at what is involved in active listening, is there anything you think you could do better in conversation to be a more effective participant?

We’d love to hear your thoughts on being an active listener. Please post in the comments below. If you can’t post here, consider signing up for a Community Member paid subscription. You’re help really makes a difference!

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Get Ahead for the Holidays with Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

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Thank you for taking a bit of your Thursday to spend with us. If you haven’t checked out our LIVE questions, Community Members, you’ll receive notifications in your inbox when we go live, and you can find the recordings in your feed. Free Subscribers, you can find the recordings on our YouTube channel EmilyPostProductions.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, here's a link to listen. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

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Halloween Tips for Households

We often dish out tips for Trick-or-Treaters the week of Halloween. Reminding kids and the grown-ups escorting them to say please and thank you, and not to take more than they are offered. But this year, we thought we’d offer some tips for those handing out the Halloween treats!

1. Be prepared for Trick-or-Treaters to start as early as the late afternoon or early evening (4:30/5 PM) and to go as late as 9 PM. You don’t have to operate in these same hours (especially if you’re in bed by 8:30 PM), but it’s important to know roughly how long the event tends to last in your neighborhood.

2. Ensure your home is well-lit and appears inviting. You really want your house to say, “Trick-or-Treaters Welcome!” in some way, shape, or form. Whether that’s jack-o-lanterns with spooky and silly carvings, paper bags with lights, also called luminarias, decorations, or even a sign that says, “Trick-or-Treaters Welcome!” Doing so reassures parents and kids that you are participating and that they are welcome on your doorstep.

3. While you don’t have to, it’s nice to have a variety of options in your candy bowl, especially since some people have chocolate or peanut allergies. While homemade treats might be acceptable with neighbors you know well, be prepared to offer store-bought individually wrapped items as well, so those who don’t know you can still participate with confidence. This isn’t because your baking might be a risk, but because kids and parents are advised to take items that can’t be tampered with. Safety first is essential when giving food to strangers. Some households even give out little toys or games (think the kinds of things you might find in Christmas crackers, or in a birthday party goodie bag) for kids who can’t eat sweet treats.

4. If it’s hard for you to hear people at your door and you don’t have a doorbell, consider hanging a sign that says, “Knock loudly, please!” You don’t want to miss anyone because of a timid knock or because you’re in a room farther from the door.

5. While it can be fun to spook Trick-or-Treaters with a scary mask, or even a scream or shout as you open the door (BOO!), do so with older kids and not the tiny tots. Be sure to be welcoming and encouraging as you greet your Trick-or-Treaters.

6. Comment on the costumes you see. If you don’t know what someone’s costume is, it’s okay to ask, “Oh wow! And what’s your costume?” Remember, not all kids are outgoing, and some might be shy; it’s okay if you don’t get a loud and proud answer.

7. Most Trick-or-Treaters are taught not to enter homes, so be prepared to have your door open for a few minutes. Or to step outside for the exchange. Of course, if it’s freezing out and a parent is with them, you can offer, but be prepared to be turned down, even though you’re being thoughtful.

8. Let kids know how many pieces of candy they are welcome to. “Oh wow! What great costumes! Please take two each!” And be patient with kids who might take a minute or two to make their choices. There’s no rush.

9. It’s thoughtful to offer a piece or two of whatever you’re serving to the parents escorting the group, if there is one.

10. Close your door gently as your Trick-or-Treaters depart so as not to startle anyone.

11. When you’re out of candy or finished entertaining Trick-or-Treaters for the night, be sure to blow out candles and turn off exterior lights so that you signal you’re no longer participating.

We’re excited to carve pumpkins tonight and get ready for Trick-or-Treaters tomorrow; however your neighborhood participates, we hope you have fun and see some really great costumes!!! Tell us about what you plan to hand out in the comments! If you can’t post here, consider signing up for a Community Member paid subscription.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection; there are numerous options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for taking a bit of your Thursday to spend with us. If you haven’t checked out our LIVE questions, Community Members, you’ll receive notifications in your inbox when we go live, and you can find the recordings in your feed. Free Subscribers, you can find the recordings on our YouTube channel EmilyPostProductions.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, here's a link to listen. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

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Inviting Guests for Thanksgiving Dinner

While it’s not even Halloween yet, we’re thinking ahead to Thanksgiving Day and how it’s time for hosts to start issuing their invitations for their holiday meal. As a host, you typically want to give yourself and your guests a longer lead time with holiday invitations. It gives people more time to prepare and can also reassure them to know they are invited and have holiday plans in place.

As a Thanksgiving Host

Here are some simple tips to help you organize yourself well as a host for Thanksgiving 2025.

• If you’re a first-time host, getting your invitations out early is important. Lots of people have traditions, or “the usual” that they rely on for this holiday, and if you’re looking to start something new, or just do something different this year, by hosting, you’ll want to get ahead of the game so that your guests know you’re an option for them.

• As a first-time host, you’ll really want to consider your capacity, both in terms of how many people you can comfortably host and whether you have the budget and supplies for hosting— dinnerware, cooking equipment, and food storage space. You don’t need china or a fancy dining room, but you will need the basics like space to sit, plates, and utensils!

• Whether this is your first time hosting or you’re hosting for the usual crew, be thoughtful as you build your guest list. Are there relationships to consider (like inviting your nephew’s new girlfriend?), or those who might not have a place to spend the holiday, whom you could include?

• Extend the invitation at least a month in advance, longer for those who might be traveling. If out-of-town guests are staying with you, set a beginning and an end for the visit. Three days is usually the standard. Most people call or text this invitation. An email with guests BCC’d might also be a good choice, as long as you don’t think it will get lost in the recipient’s inbox.

• It’s okay to use an RSVP by date, even if you issue the invitation via phone. “If you can let me know by Nov. 5th, that would be great!” Remember, it’s okay to follow up on RSVPs from guests who haven’t gotten back to you. Just be gentle with your request: “Hi Carolyn, I’m reaching out to check in and see if you can make it for Thanksgiving.” It’s okay to be lenient with a guest or two who don’t respond and assume they are coming, but with more than two, it can impact your meal preparations and table seating (if you’re assigning guests seats).

• Be as accommodating as possible to extra guests. Whether they show up on the day of, or if a guest mentions that they have someone staying with them, or who would be on their own for the holiday when you issue the invitation, it’s best to be inclusive. If you have the room, then of course, they should bring the extra person! Be creative. This is a celebration that encourages inclusion.

• Have a flexible menu plan. Because Thanksgiving is often a potluck affair, be prepared to be “coordination central” when it comes to the menu. Guests might make offers or inquire if there’s room at the table for their favorite dish. If it’s not something you can take on, by all means offer for the guest to bring the dish they are thinking of.

• As the host, be sure to inquire about allergies or restrictions so that you know what your guests can participate in and how best to accommodate them—even if that means accepting an offer for them to bring a dish that meets their needs.

We hope these tips have inspired you to think about and look forward to your Thanksgiving plans this year, whether you plan to be a host or a guest.

We’d love to hear about your hosting plans this fall, whether for Thanksgiving, a Halloween party, or something else. Please tell us in the comments. Can’t post here? Become a Community Member, or visit the Podcast section where comment threads are open to all.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us. If you haven’t checked out our LIVE questions, Community Members, you’ll receive notifications in your inbox when we go live, and you can find the recordings in your feed. Free Subscribers, you can find the recordings on our YouTube channel EmilyPostProductions.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, here's a link to listen. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to start the weekend well!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

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The following is an adapted version of the tipping advice found in Emily Post’s Etiquette, the Centennial Edition. Get your copy today!

Everyday Tipping

For many of us, tipping is an integral part of our everyday lives, whether we are out and about or receiving services at home. There are many places where tipping is completely discretionary, and other situations when we either have a minimum we should meet, or a range that is most common. Remember to always budget for a tip, and don’t feel obligated to tip more than the standard amount to impress anyone or because you feel watched. A sincere “thank you” given along with your tip can go a long way toward communicating your appreciation. Here are some common places we encounter tipping and how to handle them:

THE TIP JAR. This is a place where tipping is entirely discretionary. You can leave your change from the total, or maybe what loose change you have in your pocket. Or you can leave a dollar or more, depending on your order. You do not have to tip when you see a tip jar.

FOR A PERSONAL SERVICE. For hair, nails, waxing, personal training, massages, or spa treatments, you typically add a 15 to 20 percent tip when paying for the service.

FOR DELIVERY SERVICES. For deliveries of groceries or other daily items, or takeout from a restaurant, tip around 10 percent or $5 or more per order. For curbside pickup of groceries or food, a couple of dollars is kind ($5 if it’s a large load or order).

AS PART OF WEEKLY, MONTHLY, OR EVEN DAILY SERVICE. A regularly occurring service typically has a set rate that works for both parties, and tipping is often reserved for the end of the year. However, this shouldn’t stop you from tipping your babysitter, dog walker, cleaning person, or gardener if you really appreciate their service or they go above and beyond 1 week.

WHEN DINING OUT. For a sit-down meal, it’s important to understand that tipping isn’t an option; it’s an expectation. Even if the service isn’t good, you still leave a minimum 15 percent tip. Many people regularly tip between 15 and 20 percent for standard service, and you’re always welcome to tip more if you feel inspired. If you have a problem with the service, don’t listen to that little voice that says, I’m not going to tip. Instead, leave 15 percent and speak to the manager.

TAKE AWAY can be a full meal, a quick snack, or even just a beverage, and tipping for it is discretionary. Sometimes you’ll add your change to a tip jar, other times you’ll add a buck or two to either a sales slip, tip jar, or payment screen. It’s up to you. For large or complex orders, consider leaving a margin of up to 10 percent. You can always leave more if you wish.

How do you like to tip when it’s a discretionary tipping situation? We’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section. Can’t post here? Become a Community Member, or visit the Podcast section where comment threads are open to all.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us. If you haven’t checked out our LIVE questions, Community Members, you’ll receive notifications in your inbox when we go live, and you can find the recordings in your feed. Free Subscribers, you can find the recordings on our YouTube channel EmilyPostProductions.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, here's a link to listen. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to start the weekend well!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

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Wedding Gifts

With so many costs associated with attending a wedding these days, guests are wondering whether or not they are obligated to give a gift. Let’s examine some classic wedding etiquette regarding gifts and how to participate properly as a wedding guest.

Do I Have To Give A Wedding Gift?

The short answer is: yes. A wedding gift is still considered obligatory today, even if you don’t attend the wedding.

While many hosts will let guests know that “their presence is present enough” if you haven’t seen that on their wedding website, or been told that by the couple directly, then a gift is still an important wedding guest box to check.

This is a big moment in someone’s life, and it’s traditional in our society that you celebrate big life milestones with gifts, especially if you’ve been lucky enough to have been included. Receiving a wedding invitation should be seen as an honor. This couple is choosing you to be part of a very significant moment in their lives, and the gift honors that inclusion.

Determining What to Spend on a Wedding Gift

What should I spend on a wedding gift? This is the question we like to answer the most when it comes to wedding gifts, the answer is: whatever you have in your budget to spend on this wedding gift. It might be $25, $100, or $250 per gift, other time you might focus on spending more on a wedding that you’re closer to (like your sister’s or best friend’s), other times it might result in the same budget across the board.

Some people have grown up with the custom of “paying for your plate,” which suggests that you get a gift equal to the amount it costs the couple to host you at the wedding. This is not something we recommend or require at Emily Post. A guest should not be told, or be guessing, the per-person cost of the wedding. It’s inappropriate and suggests that guests need to reimburse a host for the burden of their attendance, when in fact a guest should be made to feel taken care of when hosted by someone for any event.

There is also the notion that a guest should get a gift equal to or greater than the gift given to them by the couple at their wedding. This one doesn’t pass the sniff test either. A) Not every person attending a wedding will get married, or is married, so right off the bat, this advice would be useless for a whole section of the population. B) It suggests that no matter what your budget is, you have to match someone else’s budget if they’ve given you a gift. We do not all operate from the same budget; it’s unfair to expect someone to get you a gift in the same price range as a gift they’ve given to you. It’s not our business what a friend or family member spends on a gift for us.

Is It Okay to Give Cash or Contribute to a Fund?

Absolutely! And while we don’t recommend a couple just use a money sharing app handle to get the word out, it is okay for guests to send checks or cash to the couple before or after the wedding, or bring either to the wedding itself. Always remember to include a card with a congratulatory message. One advantage of a check is that if it gets lost, it can be voided and reissued.

Contributing to honeymoon funds or “furnish our home” funds or giving to charities the couple has approved are also great ways to honor and celebrate a couple’s nuptials. However, we suggest giving the couple a card and mentioning the contribution. “Congratulations on your marriage! We are so happy for you and excited to see the two of you continue to build a life together! We contributed to your honeymoon fund and hope you have a wonderful trip! We can’t wait to see pictures once you’re back!”

How much you choose to give is entirely up to you and your budget.

When and How Should I Give My Wedding Gift to the Couple?

You can send your gift ahead of the wedding, bring it to the wedding (as long as there’s no request not to do this), or you could send your gift to the couple within three months after the wedding. The old rule of a year to send a wedding gift has long been put to bed. Guests should promptly get their wedding gifts to the couple if they are waiting until after the big day. This also helps couples get thank-you notes done in a timely manner.

No matter when you give your gift, wrapping it nicely is thoughtful and helps to celebrate the occasion. For those who aren’t fans of the waste wrappings that can incur, by all means use recycled or recyclable paper, or a reusable wrapping.

Whatever you wrap your gift in, ALWAYS include a card with your congratulations and make sure it is secured to the gift.

What If I Can’t Afford a Gift?

If you can’t afford a gift (or the materials to make one), then be sure to give a card with thoughtful words of congratulations. Couples who didn’t receive gifts from their guests were often hurt that no words of congratulations or acknowledgment at all came from some guests. It’s always best to do a small something (the card) than what often ends up looking like a big nothing.

What is a wedding gift you felt really great about giving? We’d love to hear your experience and thoughts in the comment section. Can’t post here? Become a Community Member, or visit the Podcast section where comment threads are open to all.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

Community Membership Subscription

Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Friday with us. If you haven’t checked out our LIVE questions, Community Members, you’ll get notifications in your inbox of when we’re going LIVE, and you can find the recordings in your feed. Free Subscribers, you can find the recordings on our YouTube channel EmilyPostProductions.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, here's a link to listen. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to start the weekend well!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

A Community Membership is a Great Gift or Benefit!

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Classroom Manners

You may only have fifty minutes per class, but you are all there for the same thing. The only one with a different task, of course, is the teacher. Here are tips to help make your time in class productive and pleasant for you, your classmates, and your teacher.

Before Class Begins

When you arrive in the room, greet everyone with a smile. You don't have to engage in a long dialogue. A simple "hi" or "good morning" will do. If you have time to talk with your friends before class, do it quietly so you won't distract others who might be doing last-minute studying.

If you have last-minute studying and your friends want to talk, let them know you have something to finish and will catch up later.

There are lots of times when you might need to ask a teacher about something. Depending on when you ask, it might not be a good time for the teacher to address, so start off by asking when a good time to discuss XYZ would be. If it’s now, great! If not, your teacher will suggest a better time and you can address the issue with them then.

If someone else is talking to the teacher and you have to wait your turn, stand back a bit to respect the other student’s privacy. This is a great life lesson for our other public spaces as well (in line at the post office, the bank, and at the pharmacy or grocery store).

Be mindful of your things. Your bags can be on the floor next to you. Leave chairs and work areas clear for people to use. Keep your book bag where no one can trip over it. Whether you are seated at a desk or table or in an auditorium, try to restrict yourself and your things to the space provided for one person.

During Class

You get out of class what you put into it. Even if you're not interested in the subject in general, pay attention and try to find a particular aspect that interests you. Paying attention is also a huge sign of respect not just to the teacher as they teach, but to your fellow students who are trying to focus as well.

Turn off your phone, or at least silence notifications. This is respectful to everyone, including you - you don’t need those distractions when you’re trying to learn!

When you have something to say, do it in the style of the class. If it's a lecture class, raise your hand when you have a question. If it's a discussion class, wait until the person speaking has finished. When others are speaking, be an active listener, nodding along to show you understand what they are saying, or responding with appropriate reactions to things like surprising or shocking facts, or even funny moments.

Follow classroom guidelines for getting up, walking around, and leaving for the restroom. Each teacher may have different standards.

You want to have an active and engaged posture during class. Sit up at your desk or table. Lying all over your desk is disrespectful to your teacher and fellow students alike. You may be tired (or bored), but that's no excuse for making everyone around you suffer, too.

Avoid passing notes or texting in class. This is just as rude as interrupting the class.

When Class Is Over

Leaving class well is just as important as greeting others when you arrive. Remember to pick up after yourself, collecting any tissues, bits of paper, or garbage that you’ve created during the lesson and putting it in the garbage or away if it’s something you’re keeping.

Move promptly out of the classroom to make room for those coming in. If you need to talk to your teacher, again, ask if it's a good time. Even if your teacher is not talking to another student, they may need time to prepare for the next class. If so, set a time to talk later.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

Community Membership Subscription

Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us.

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to start the weekend well!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

A Community Membership Is A Great Gift or Benefit!

Are you looking for a great employee benefit or member gift? Look no further than a paid subscription to this publication. Group subscriptions are 20% off. Sign your group up today!

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Modern Scheduling Manners

We have many options for scheduling with our business contacts today, depending on the connection we’re trying to meet with and how we’re trying to connect. Is it internal or external? Will it be on-site, off-site, virtual, or over the phone? Are the people doing the scheduling also attending the meeting, or are they scheduling on behalf of someone? Is dropping a scheduling link into an email the same as handing someone your physical calendar and asking them to find a spot that works?

The care we take with setting up our meetings and calls in business will go a long way toward starting that meeting or conversation off on the right foot. Everyone wins when scheduling is as smooth and efficient as possible.

The following excerpt can be found on page 103 of Emily Post’s Business Etiquette.

Common Scheduling Courtesies

• Offer a client or superior the option of booking directly with you or through a scheduling link if you have one. Providing both options lets the other person decide, and that’s what makes it a courtesy.

• If the other party hasn’t chosen to use your booking link, offer to send a calendar invitation once a time is selected. Remember to include everyone who will be on the call.

• When setting up the calendar appointment, include the necessary details, such as phone numbers or links, in the notes section. As the recipient, pay attention to the notes section of a calendar appointment. It may contain call-in info or links to connect for a call, meeting, or interview.

• If someone responds to a request for a meeting time with “Well, what works for you?” feel confident stating what does work best for you.

• Accept or decline calendar appointments as soon as possible so that either they appear on your calendar for recordkeeping, or the host knows you cannot attend.

• Choose intentionally and wisely whom you give access to book directly on your calendar, and pay attention to whether your booking link allows recipients to use the link again.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us. What are some of your scheduling pet peeves? Let us know in the comments below!

If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to start the weekend well!

Until next time,
Lizzie and Dan

A Community Membership Is A Great Gift or Benefit!

Are you looking for a great employee benefit or member gift? Look no further than a paid subscription to this publication. Group subscriptions are 20% off. Sign your group up today!

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What To Say When Someone Dies

There are so many questions that come from encounters with those who are grieving. At these difficult times, the desire to help can be strong, but we are not always sure of the "right" thing to say. When speaking with someone who is grieving, here are some replies that can offer comfort and condolence:

What to Say When Someone Passes Away:

• “I am sorry for your loss.”

• “I am so sorry.”

• "I am here for you."

A hug, embrace, or touch on someone’s shoulder or hand are all common gestures, whether you’re acquaintances or close. You might relay a positive story about the deceased if the situation or environment is appropriate.

At the funeral, when you have a moment to speak with the deceased’s relatives and other friends would be an appropriate, natural, and good time to relay a story, thought, or some words of condolence. When the bereaved are attending some other social function, use your judgment when talking about the deceased or offering comfort. Take your cues from them.

If the bereaved bring up the name of the departed, this can be an indication that they are willing to talk and share memories about the person. You might follow with, ”Mike really loved those camping trips. He would just light up, even if the weather was bad.”

However, if the bereaved is looking tense, or they aren’t bringing up the deceased, it would indicate that you shouldn’t either.

Offer Help With a Specific Suggestion

“I am so sorry for your loss. I would like to help with grocery shopping/house cleaning/watching the kids. I can call you in a day or two to discuss it more if you’d like.” This is a nice offer because it’s a specific offer, which gives the person something direct to respond to. Instead of saying something like, “Let me know if you need help,” which can work between close friends and family, but is harder when relationships are a ring or two out of your closest social orbit.

By ending with “if you’d like” you recognize that the other person may not want to take you up on your offer, and it helps make it easier if they’d like to say no.

What not to say:

• "Everything happens for a reason."

• “You can have other children.” (In the instance of the loss of a child.)

• “It is God’s will.”

• “God does not give us more than we can bear.”

• “You are not ready for that yet.”

• "I know just how you feel."

• "Did she have life insurance?"

If this article finds you in a time of grieving, let us offer our condolences as well. We wish you comfort and support at this time.

Is there a moment you have from a time of grieving where someone’s words were just the right thing? If so, please consider sharing in the comments section. Today, the comments are open to all.

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette is here!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us. If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to take you into the weekend.

All our best,
Lizzie and Dan

A Community Membership Is A Great Gift or Benefit!

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The Company Picnic

(This excerpt can be found on page 207 in Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, our newest edition.)

Whether it's actually a company picnic or a casual gathering at the boss's house, when we're invited to a casual event outside of the office, and, in some cases, we have been given plus-ones for a partner, date, friend, or our family to attend with us, we are straddling the work-life balance. If that picnic’s at a beach or a pool party at a colleague's house, will you wear your swimsuit?

Trunks or Speedo? Bikini, tankini, one-piece swimsuit? The divide between casual and professional and personal and professional can get blurry at these times, and having a good sense of what you are comfortable with is important. If you don't mix work and your personal life, you might choose to attend the event solo, and that's okay. (Though you should be prepared for people to ask where your partner or family are if they know you have one. "Just me today, they've got other plans" would be a fine answer.)

Bring with you anything that has been suggested or requested. If you're headed to a colleague's home, it's thoughtful to arrive with some flowers or a small hosting gift-especially if you've never been there—but it shouldn't be expected. Hosts invite guests for the pleasure of their company, not a potential hosting gift.

Allow yourself to enjoy the refreshments and participate in activities or games when you can. Your host, whether a colleague or your boss, hopes for you to enjoy yourself. It might feel like the work pressure is all around because these are your workmates, and you're used to having your professional self operating around them, but this is one of those times when it truly is okay to relax a little bit. You can always look to your host for inspiration if you're unsure how casually to relax into the event.

Have you ever attended a company picnic? If so, what were some of the behaviors you noticed on display? Please share them in the comments section below. Can’t post here? Head over to the Monday Podcast post where the comment thread is open to all, or get a Community Member subscription today:

Community Member Subscription With your support, the Emily Post Institute can continue providing advice for years to come. Please join our Community Membership today! You’re help really makes a difference!

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Emily Post’s Business Etiquette is here!

Signed and unsigned copies of our latest book, Emily Post’s Business Etiquette, are available through our local bookstore, Bridgeside Books. Bridgeside Books can also secure copies of our other titles. Check out the Emily Post Collection there; there are so many options for great gifts!

Order Signed Copies

Thank you for spending a bit of your Thursday with us. If you haven’t heard this week’s podcast yet, you can listen here. Keep an eye out for the Saturday Sip, it’s up next to take you into the weekend.

All our best,
Lizzie and Dan

A Community Membership Is A Great Gift or Benefit!

Are you looking for a great employee benefit or member gift? Look no further than a paid subscription to this publication. Group subscriptions are 20% off and come with $50 to spend on our digital downloads for each person you sign up. Sign your group up today!

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